So You Think You Can Pick Up Women on Airplanes? Part 2
December 09, 2010, By P.K. Lassiter 34 comments
When I last checked in, we were cruising at 35,000 feet. If you look out to the left you will see an America obsessed with dancing. To the right – single people littering the landscape, looking for someone to partner with on that dance of life. A relationship.
And I was giving you some do’s and don’ts when it comes to starting that relationship right here and now. Inside the airplane.
Here’s a recap:
Do:
- Get on the flight last
- Chat with the flight attendant
- Start the conversation
- Mix up your routine
Don’t:
- Dress too casually
- Drink heavily
- Uproot the person sitting next to her
So far so good. It’s been a smooth ride. So here are a few more of the have’s and have not’s of men who have successfully navigated the sometimes shaky dance floor of an airplane, and then brought it home with a perfect landing.
Do: Get up and "stretch your legs." Walk around, but with a purpose. Head to the galley and ask for a glass of water. Retrieve a magazine from the overhead compartment. Just get out of your seat. You need to be seen be able to make eye contact so you can speak with her so you can … you get my drift. The kneebone’s connected to the shinbone …
Don’t: Go shoeless. This is the hallmark of the "comfortable man," and that’s never good. You’re not at home watching SportsCenter on the flatscreen. Your shoes are one of the biggest statements about who you are. They mean a lot to the ladies (more on this in a later column). Do not wander up and down the aisles with your mismatched yellow--toed, blue dress socks. You’re just begging for the brush off.
Do: Buy something. As I mentioned before a drink or two is good. But if you don’t drink, buy a snack. Put it out there that you’re not frugal. Are these items over-priced? You bet. But some cheese and crackers are not going to kill you. It looks as if you are satisfying your wants, and your willing to pay a little something for it. It’s just a snack … Don’t go overboard. Five bucks is plenty. But …
Don’t: Flash the cash. You don’t need to buy the plane a round or kill the entire stock of single-serving Pringles. You don’t want to look desperate for attention, or downright needy. Take care of yourself and the rest will fall into place. And yes – I’ve seen the overzealous male buy the plane a round. He crashed and burned.
Do: Straighten up. Buttons tend to jostle loose and shirts become un-tucked after time in those cramped seats. Make sure you manage to stay on top of it. If you can manage to look like you did when the flight started as it is coming to a close, then you’ve succeeded. Yes … they do notice.
Don’t: Groom. I cannot tell you how many times I have seen men completely blow it by whipping out the 1984 handle-comb and start repetitions with the hair on their head (or what’s left of it). If you need a to re-assess and adjust -- go to the bathroom. During one flight I witnessed a single man in his 40’s actually pull out fingernail clippers and start to cut. Whatever chances he had headed to the Earth faster than skydiver without a parachute. The plane collectively retracted. And he never even knew it.
I once shared this information with a man across the aisle from me. He was intrigued enough to give it a shot – right then and there. And on that very flight he exchanged numbers with a woman sitting one row in front of him.
So dance away young man. Lead. You see that woman in 14E? She’s been looking for someone to trip the light fantastic with her. And you’re just the pilot to do so. You think you can pick up women on airplanes? Roger that.
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